Lock and Key
Jiel Narvekar
I move from room to room.
A feeling of dread, a feeling of gloom.
I search in drawers, in cupboards, in cabinets.
I scrabble about belongings, feeling stuck within brackets.
I pass by the mirror and it shows me a reflection.
The person standing there, I do not understand her expression.
Who is this woman staring back at me?
Is she a friend, foe or does she hold the key?
The key that I need to find.
I have rummaged through my house and my mind.
The key that holds the precious box.
The one where my true self I keep locked.
I ask her, ‘Can you remember where is the key?’
She replies, ‘Why are you so desperate to be free?’
Tears running down my face and hers.
We cry, we howl, unable to change gears.
The phone rings and I must respond.
The emotions I feel cannot go beyond.
I adjust my voice and talk about the day.
Unable to tell them that it is all work and no play.
That I am tired to the bone.
That I have a life that I feel I do not own.
I finish the call and look at her in the mirror.
She smiles with a sadness that I know is familiar.
We decide we should stop the search.
Else it would put the others in a lurch.
Someday we will find the key.
That time I promise her we will be free.
That day is not today, I decide.
It is not the time for the stars to collide.
I fix myself, my mind, and my home.
I appear flippant as they walk in, while I am fixing the garden gnome.
Jiel is an HR professional based in Mumbai. She has written HR related articles published in Economic Times HR World, HR Tales and for in-house corporate magazines. In Dec 2023, her poem ‘Skin’ was selected for an anthology series with Writer's Pocket, an Indian publication house. The anthology is titled - 'City Lights'.
In Jan 2024, her work was selected for a poetry anthology series with House of Publishing, an Indian publication house. The anthology titled – ‘120 best poems, Volume 5', has 12 poems by Jiel. In Feb 2024, Jiel self-published a collection of 30 poems titled - 'Melancholy, Maybe'.The book is currently available on Amazon, FlipKart and Kindle Unlimited. Most recently Jiel's poem titled, 'The Last Goodbye' has been selected by Wingword / Delhi Poetry Slam for an anthology. Jiel's fiction short story titled, 'The Havisham Effect', was recently published by Kitaab International.
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